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Asymmetrically Sunken Continents by the1smjb Asymmetrically Sunken Continents :iconthe1smjb:the1smjb 0 1
Literature
The Grand Imperial Subterranean Theater, chapter 1
Chapter 1
When the drow built a road, they built a fucking road, Zheremi Shieldman thought. First, you dug a trench where the road will go down, then you fill the bottom of the trench with large rocks, then you cover that with a layer of smaller rocks, pebbles, and cement, then you cover that with a layer of cement and broken pottery, and only after all that do you lay down the paving stones, which have to be cut so that they fit together perfectly. It was easy to see where they were going, too, as they were digging up an existing gravel road to make the new one. Thus went the eternal dance in this region, the drow replacing gravel roads with paved ones when it was in the hands of the Empire of Ilir, the humans tearing up paved roads and replacing them with gravel when the region was in the hands of the Kingdom of Lanakas, perhaps out of spite but more likely because denying the drow access into their territory was more important than the value of the paved roads themselves, w
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TABP s 0135 - Security by the1smjb TABP s 0135 - Security :iconthe1smjb:the1smjb 0 0 TABP s 0134 - Speak of the Devil (so to Speak) by the1smjb TABP s 0134 - Speak of the Devil (so to Speak) :iconthe1smjb:the1smjb 0 0 TABP s 0133 - A Difference of Opinion by the1smjb TABP s 0133 - A Difference of Opinion :iconthe1smjb:the1smjb 0 0 TABP s 0132 - Comforting Thought by the1smjb TABP s 0132 - Comforting Thought :iconthe1smjb:the1smjb 1 0 TABP n 0017 - A Joke I Didn't Use by the1smjb TABP n 0017 - A Joke I Didn't Use :iconthe1smjb:the1smjb 2 0
Literature
Suffering in Silence
Recently I attended an estate sale at a manor; for legal reasons, I can't disclose where. One of the most interesting features of the manor was the existence of a panic room on the third floor which had heavily reinforced walls, floor, and ceiling; I had no idea this was popular when this mansion was built! (Later research showed that it was not.) During the course of the event, I bought a handsome writing desk and learned that the manor itself was for sale, and rather cheap at that. I figured I could easily make the asking price back in under a year by converting the place into apartments, but I'm not an idiot: there had to be some reason it was so cheap. I did some research, and while I didn't find a termite infestation or anything of that sort, I learned that the manor, while scrupulously maintained, hadn't been inhabited since...well, I probably shouldn't disclose that, either. Then I unlocked the writing desk and found these documents:
As I write this, the Floor is l
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TABP s 0131 - Firm by the1smjb TABP s 0131 - Firm :iconthe1smjb:the1smjb 0 0 TABP s 0130 - Alpha Males and Other Things by the1smjb TABP s 0130 - Alpha Males and Other Things :iconthe1smjb:the1smjb 0 0 TABP s 0129 - Because It Amuses Him by the1smjb
Mature content
TABP s 0129 - Because It Amuses Him :iconthe1smjb:the1smjb 0 1
TABP s 0128 - Barking Up the Wrong Tree by the1smjb TABP s 0128 - Barking Up the Wrong Tree :iconthe1smjb:the1smjb 0 0 TABP s 0127 - It's Seriously not that Big a D by the1smjb TABP s 0127 - It's Seriously not that Big a D :iconthe1smjb:the1smjb 0 0 TABP s 0126 - How to Be (Better than) a Player by the1smjb TABP s 0126 - How to Be (Better than) a Player :iconthe1smjb:the1smjb 1 0 TABP s 0125 - Plot Thread: Murdered by the1smjb TABP s 0125 - Plot Thread: Murdered :iconthe1smjb:the1smjb 0 0 TABP s 0124 - Kinsey by the1smjb TABP s 0124 - Kinsey :iconthe1smjb:the1smjb 0 0

Favourites

Extreme Sexual Dimorphs by rob-powell Extreme Sexual Dimorphs :iconrob-powell:rob-powell 716 46 BONK! (Gravity Falls Comic) by PurplePassion3 BONK! (Gravity Falls Comic) :iconpurplepassion3:PurplePassion3 262 41 Don't be itchy man by SeaGerdy Don't be itchy man :iconseagerdy:SeaGerdy 213 6 Dork by HardlyQuinn Dork :iconhardlyquinn:HardlyQuinn 140 6 Wipper by HardlyQuinn Wipper :iconhardlyquinn:HardlyQuinn 126 11 Wendy Smiles by AuroraFolf Wendy Smiles :iconaurorafolf:AuroraFolf 150 8 Mother's day by markmak Mother's day :iconmarkmak:markmak 1,930 419 Sleepy head by markmak Sleepy head :iconmarkmak:markmak 947 85 Sitting and Swooning by K-El-Amrani Sitting and Swooning :iconk-el-amrani:K-El-Amrani 150 9 Somebody to Love? by K-El-Amrani Somebody to Love? :iconk-el-amrani:K-El-Amrani 126 30 Go Go Dipper by nyarths3 Go Go Dipper :iconnyarths3:nyarths3 159 26 Wedding kiss by Steggmatt Wedding kiss :iconsteggmatt:Steggmatt 218 90 Kiss by markmak Kiss :iconmarkmak:markmak 1,379 284 The Wedding by markmak The Wedding :iconmarkmak:markmak 2,331 375 Thanks by markmak Thanks :iconmarkmak:markmak 2,854 573 The day before summer by markmak The day before summer :iconmarkmak:markmak 2,844 249

Activity


Just looked at my page for the first time in forever, and all my slays and whatnot have been moved off my featured page. WTF?

Speaking of slays, gots me some old rainslays I forgot to post...several months ago. A year? Who knows? Too lazy to check.

Also speaking of slays, I've figured out how to get text to stay within the bubble in open office--though for some reason it means that it's no longer capable of being aligned in any way but from the top down--so I suppose I'm out of excuses for not making new slays.

That's the thing about depression, though; once the lethargy gets you, it doesn't want to let go.

deviantID

the1smjb
shaun
United States
Interests

Comments


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:iconhawk222:
hawk222 Featured By Owner Sep 30, 2016  Student Artist
Happy birthday!
Reply
:iconxykon-7549:
Xykon-7549 Featured By Owner Jul 23, 2016
Hello. Do you still read EGS?
Reply
:iconhawk222:
hawk222 Featured By Owner Sep 30, 2015  Student Artist
Happy birthday!
Reply
:iconromanjones:
RomanJones Featured By Owner Feb 17, 2015  Professional Digital Artist
Thanks for the watch!!
Reply
:iconmagicshoppe:
magicshoppe Featured By Owner Sep 30, 2014
Have a birthday. And make it happy.
Reply
:iconjocelynsamara:
JocelynSamara Featured By Owner Aug 7, 2013  Professional Writer
I'ma follow you.  Just in case you slay me some more. XD
Reply
:icongwenny-eve:
Gwenny-Eve Featured By Owner Jun 29, 2013  Hobbyist Traditional Artist
I'm a big fan of Shive's work, and you've managed to not insult me by... I guess you seem to call it 'Slay'ing it. Good work~
Reply
:iconpartner555:
partner555 Featured By Owner Apr 6, 2013
Your slays are hilarious.
Reply
:iconltofsmitia:
lTofSMITIA Featured By Owner Jan 15, 2013  Hobbyist Writer
Dude.

You're frickin funny. Keep doing stuff.
Reply
:iconclavis-salomonis:
Clavis-Salomonis Featured By Owner Sep 30, 2012  Student General Artist
Happy Birthday! :party:
Reply
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